현역일 때는, 전 세계에 가서 지낼 곳이 많은데 갈 시간이 없다고 늘 자랑하곤 했습니다. 그래서 자뻑이란 핀잔을 듣는 편입니다만, 정말 만나면 반가워하고 때론 부부침실까지도 내어주는 분들이 있기 때문입니다. 이제 목회에서 은퇴를 했지만 에스라성경대학원대학교에 와서 봉사하기에 시간이 없기는 마찬가지입니다. 학교가 있는 경기도 고양에 올라가면 교직원숙소로 지은 <신관>이란 건물에 살지만, 방학이 되어 울산에 내려오면, 성도들의 사랑과 관심으로 마련된 집이 있습니다.
그런데 그 집의 서재실 문인방 위에는 未讀萬卷之室(미독만권지실)이란 한자로 새겨진 서각이 붙어있습니다. 외삼촌이 유학을 마치고 돌아왔을 때 공부한 조카인 저에게 선물한 것입니다. 직역하면 읽지 못한 책이 만권이나 있는 방이라는 뜻이겠지만 의역을 하면 읽고 싶은 책이 만권이나 있는 방이라는 의미입니다. 40대 초반 처음 선물을 받았을 때와는 달리 나이가 들어 칠십 중반을 향해 갈수록 뜻이 새로와집니다. 다행히 울산의 제 서재는 넓지를 않아서 책장을 빈 벽면에 하나 더 만든다고 해도 600권 정도 들어갈 수 있을 겁니다. 하긴 未讀萬卷之室(미독만권지실)이란 서각이 걸린 방 말고도 책장이 있는 방이 있으니까 1200권은 이미 꽂혀있습니다.
그러므로 70대 중반에 접어든 저에게는 이제 새로운 책장문제가 아니라 이미 꽂혀있는 책들을 읽을 시간이 더 문제입니다. 새해에는 1주일에 500쪽의 책을 한 권씩 읽겠다고 호기를 부렸지만 첫 주간이 지나면서 한 달에 한 권으로 신속히 조정했습니다. 하지만 그 대단한 프로젝트 덕분에 읽기 시작한 책, <칭기스 칸, 잠든 유럽을 깨우다>는 비록 지금 150쪽 근방을 달리지만 1월말까지 특히 설연휴를 잘 활용하면 450쪽 책을 완독할 것 같습니다. 여느 은퇴자처럼 오로지 독서에만 집중할 수 있다면 벌써 끝을 내고도 남았을 것입니다. 하지만 저는 “자나 깨나 불조심, 앉으나 서나 학생모집”에다가 3월과 4월에 태백에 있는 목회자들을 위해서 <설교자를 위한 누가복음 특강>을 준비하는 일도 해야 합니다.
월요일 두 번, 오전 10시부터 오후 5시까지, 그러니까 60분 강의 기준 하루 5강씩 총 10강으로 전부를 살펴야 합니다. 작년 봄에 두란노에서 누가복음 강해설교집 첫 권 <구원사의 서곡>이 나왔는데 이번 2월에는 둘째 권 <예수의 제자>가 나옵니다. 그러면 마지막 책만 남는 셈입니다. 문제는 책을 읽지 않는 새로운 세대인데다가 전집류는 더더욱 무서워하니, 작년에 계획대로 3권을 다 내지 못한 출판사의 고충도 느껴집니다. 이래저래 남은 날들에 비해서 읽고 싶은 책들은 많지만 자신의 처지를 알아야 하니 未讀萬卷之室(미독만권지실)이 아니라 未讀千之室(미독천권지실)로, 아니 겸손하게 未讀百卷之室(미독백권지실)이 더 좋을 것 같습니다.
During my active pastoral ministry, I used to boast that I had countless places across the globe to visit and stay, yet never the time to go. People often teased me for being conceited, but I said so because there were truly folks who would welcome us with open arms, sometimes even giving up their own master bedroom for us. Though I have now retired from pastoral ministry, I am serving at Ezra Bible Graduate University, so I find myself just as short on time as ever. When I head up to Goyang in Gyeonggi-do where the school is located, I reside in a faculty dormitory building called the "New Hall." But when vacation arrives and I return home to Ulsan, there is a house lovingly prepared through the heartfelt care and affection of our church members.
Above the lintel of my study door in that house hangs a carved wooden plaque bearing the Chinese characters 未讀萬卷之室 (Midongmangwonjisil). It was a gift from my maternal uncle when I returned from studying abroad, presented to his nephew who had dedicated himself to learning. Literally translated, it means "A room containing ten thousand unread books," but poetically rendered, it signifies "A room graced with ten thousand books one yearns to read." When I first received it in my early forties, it felt one way; now, as the years have passed and I am heading into my mid-seventies, its meaning takes on a fresh, profound resonance. Fortunately, my study in Ulsan is not excessively large, so even if I built another bookshelf along the remaining blank wall, it could hold perhaps six hundred volumes. That said, besides the study where the plaque hangs, there is another room with bookshelves, so some 1,200 books are already lined up on the shelves.
Therefore, having reached my mid-seventies, my real dilemma is no longer about finding more shelf space, but rather finding the time to read the books already waiting there. At the start of the New Year, I boldly resolved to read one 500-page book each week, but by the time the first week had passed, I promptly adjusted my goal to one book a month. Nevertheless, thanks to that ambitious project, I began reading Genghis Khan and the Making of the Modern World. Though I am currently around page 150, I believe I can finish all 450 pages by the end of January, especially if I make good use of the Lunar New Year holiday. If I were like other retirees who could dedicate themselves solely to reading, I would have finished it long ago. However, my days are filled with the campus mantra—"Awake or asleep, beware of fire; sitting or standing, recruit students"—in addition to preparing a special lecture series on the Gospel of Luke for pastors in Taebaek this coming March and April.
Over two Mondays, from 10:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m.—which means five 60-minute lectures a day, totaling ten lectures—I must examine the entire text. Last spring, Duranno published the first volume of my Luke expository sermon series, The Prelude to Salvation History, and this February, the second volume, Disciples of Jesus, will be released. That leaves only the final volume. The challenge is that the younger generation rarely reads books, and multi-volume series can seem downright intimidating, so I fully appreciate the publisher's difficulties in not being able to release all three volumes last year as planned. In one way or another, compared to the days I have left, the books I wish to read are many. Yet knowing one's own limits, perhaps instead of "A Room of Ten Thousand Unread Books" (Midongmangwonjisil), it should be "A Room of a Thousand Unread Books" (Midongcheongwonjisil)—or more humbly, "A Room of a Hundred Unread Books" (Midongbaekgwonjisil).
Gedurende my jare in die aktiewe bediening het ek dikwels gespog dat ek oral oor die wêreld heen plekke gehad het om te vertoef, maar nooit die tyd om soontoe te reis nie. Mense het my soms gespot dat ek verwaand was, maar dit was werklik omdat daar vriende en gelowiges was wat ons met sulke ope arms verwelkom het dat hulle selfs hul eie hoofslaapkamer aan ons afgestaan het. Al het ek nou uit die gemeentelike bediening afgetree, dien ek tans by die Ezra Bybelse Nagraadse Universiteit, en daarom het ek net so min vrye tyd soos vantevore. Wanneer ek opreis na Goyang in Gyeonggi-do waar die skool geleë is, bly ek in die personeelkwartiere genaamd die "Nuwe Gebou." Maar wanneer die vakansie aanbreek en ek terugkeer na Ulsan, wag daar 'n huis wat met groot liefde en sorg deur die lidmate van Ulsan Gemeente vir ons voorberei is.
Bo die deurlat van my studeerkamer in daardie huis hang daar egter 'n houtsneewerk met die Chinese karakters 未讀萬卷之室 (Midongmangwonjisil). Dit was 'n geskenk van my oom aan moederskant toe hy teruggekeer het van sy buitelandse studies, gegee aan my as 'n leergierige nefie wat ook gestudeer het. Letterlik vertaal beteken dit "'n Kamer met tienduisend ongeleesde boeke," maar vryer vertaal dui dit op "'n Kamer met tienduisend boeke wat 'n mens nog graag wil lees." Toe ek dit in my vroeë veertigs as geskenk ontvang het, het dit een betekenis gehad; nou, namate die jare aangestap het en ek my middel-sewentigs nader, kry dit 'n heeltemal nuwe trefkrag. Gelukkig is my studeerkamer in Ulsan nie baie ruim nie, so selfs al sou ek nog 'n boekrak teen die leë muur aanbring, sal dit hoogstens omtrent seshonderd boeke kan hou. Nietemin, buiten die kamer waar die houtsneewerk hang, is daar nog 'n kamer met boekrakke, sodat daar reeds sowat 1 200 boeke op die rakke pryk.
Vir my, wat nou in my middel-sewentigs is, gaan dit dus nie meer oor die gebrek aan boekrakke nie, maar eerder oor die kosbare tyd om die boeke wat reeds daar staan, deur te lees. Aan die begin van die nuwe jaar het ek my met groot bravade voorgeneem om elke week 'n boek van 500 bladsye deur te werk, maar toe die eerste week verbygaan, het ek my doelwit vinnig aangepas na een boek per maand. Nietemin, danksy daardie ambisieuse voorneme het ek begin lees aan Genghis Khan and the Making of the Modern World. Al trek ek tans eers by bladsy 150, glo ek dat ek die boek van 450 bladsye teen die einde van Januarie sal kan voltooi, veral as ek die Maannuwejaarsvakansie goed benut. As ek soos ander afgetredenes slegs op lees kon fokus, sou ek dit lankal klaargehad het. Maar my dae word gevul met ons universiteitsleuse—"Wakker of aan die slaap, pas op vir brand; sit of staan, werf nuwe studente"—benewens die voorbereiding van 'n spesiale lesingreeks oor die Evangelie volgens Lukas vir leraars in Taebaek gedurende Maart en April.
Oor twee Maandae, van tienuur die oggend tot vyfuur die middag—dit wil sê vyf lesings van 60 minute elk per dag, altesaam tien lesings—moet ek die hele teks behandel. Verlede lente het Duranno die eerste deel van my verklaringsreeks oor Lukas uitgegee, getiteld Die Voorspel tot die Verlossingsgeskiedenis, en nou in Februarie verskyn die tweede deel, Dissipels van Jesus. Daarna bly slegs die laaste deel oor. Die uitdaging is egter dat die nuwe geslag bitter min lees en veral terugdeins vir meerdelige reekse; ek begryp dus die uitgewer se dilemma waarom al drie dele nie verlede jaar volgens plan kon verskyn nie. Hoe dit ook al sy, gemeet aan die dae wat my nog rus, is daar baie boeke wat ek graag wil lees. Tog moet 'n mens jou eie perke ken, en daarom pas die naam 未讀千卷之室 (Midongcheongwonjisil—"'n Kamer van Duisend Ongeleesde Boeke") dalk beter, of selfs meer beskeie: 未讀百卷之室 (Midongbaekgwonjisil—"'n Kamer van Honderd Ongeleesde Boeke").