울산교회 담임으로서 선교사님께 보내는 마지막 편지입니다. 해마다 연말이 가까워지면 선교사님들께 보내는 선물을 모집하는 뉴스를 들으면서(그것도 성도들과 달리 세 차례나 연속으로 들으면서) 선교사님께 일 년에 한 번이라도 편지를 써서 보내는 것이 “성도가 서로 교제하는 것” 을 고백하는 후원교회 목사로서 기본 예의라는 생각이 들었기 때문입니다. 1년에 한 차례도 편지가 없는 선교사님에 대한 후원 여부를 후원교회로서는 쉽게 논의하지만 후원교회 목사로서 10년에 한 번도 편지를 보내지 않아도 담임 목사의 자격 여부에 대해 어떤 선교사님도 의문을 품지 않긴 합니다. 그러나 그런 관행은, 생각해보면 “성도의 교제”도 아니고, 하나님 나라 건설을 위한 동역도 더더욱 아니라는 깨달음을 주셔서 그동안 몇 차례 서신으로 교제를 나눌 수 있어서 감사합니다.
구주대망 2019년 11월 12일, 마지막 편지를 쓰는 오늘 저녁에도 고신 멤버케어원에서 주관하는 R&R “쉼과 회복”을 위한 프로그램을 섬기고 있습니다. 이제 연말이면 목회를 마감하고 그와 동시에 울산교회 담임목사로서 하는 일들도 내려놓습니다. 시원섭섭하냐고요? 아닙니다. 오히려 방학을 앞둔 소년의 기쁨과 설렘이 있습니다. 생각해보면 나와 같은 자유로운 영혼이 목회자로서 사역을 잘 감당했다는 남모르는 뿌듯함도 있습니다. 사실 마음뿐 아니라 주어진 사명을 잘 감당할 수 있는 건강도 하나님이 주신 선물이었기에 감사합니다.
올 한 해 동안 가장 많이 받은 질문은 “은퇴 후에 무엇을 할 것이냐?”는 것이었고 판에 박은 대답은 “모른다”는 것이었습니다. 그러면서 덧붙인 말은 “현역일 때 주인께서 은퇴 후에도 주인이시고 70평생 살면서 내가 노는 꼴을 못 봐준 분이 그렇게 놀멍쉬멍 놓아두진 않을 것이란 불길한 (?) 예감이 있다”고 조크를 했습니다. 하여간 지금으로서는 내년 한 해는 안식년다운 쉼을 제대로 가지려고 합니다. 그리고 2021년부터는 4년간 사역할 곳에 대한 제안을 받았고 그 일을 두고 기도하고 있습니다. 그 사역이 그동안 내가 관심을 갖고 있던 일이고, 나를 준비시킨 분의 나라 확장을 위한 일이라면 어찌 피해갈 수 있겠습니까?
돌이켜 보면 그동안 고신 선교 후원 교회들과 함께 한 시간들, 또한 멤버 케어사역을 위해서, 내년 6월로 마감하는 성경번역선교회 이사장 사역도, 1년 한 차례 이같이 편지라도 보내는 일도 모두 하나님께서 제게 주신 특권이었습니다. 울산교회 담임사역은 연말로 끝나지만 그동안 살던 집에서 계속 살아갈 것입니다. 다행히 괜찮은 게스트룸도 준비되어 있어서, 복음을 위하여 사는 나그네들을 섬길 수 있다는 것도 작은 기쁨입니다. 나이와 건강의 변수에 따라서 언제까지 섬길 수 있을 것인지는 하나님만이 아시지만… 섬김은 특권이었습니다. 감사합니다.
This is my final letter to our missionaries as the senior pastor of Ulsan Church. Every year, as year-end approaches and announcements are made to collect gifts for missionaries (which, unlike the congregation, I hear three times in a row across the services), I have felt that writing at least one letter a year is a basic courtesy for a pastor of a supporting church who professes the "communion of saints." Supporting churches often readily debate whether to continue supporting a missionary who hasn't sent a letter all year, yet no missionary ever questions whether a pastor is qualified to lead just because he hasn't sent a single letter in ten years. However, when I reflected on it, God made me realize that such a one-sided convention is neither the true "communion of saints" nor genuine partnership in building God's Kingdom. Therefore, I am deeply grateful for the opportunities we have had to share fellowship through these letters over the years.
This evening of November 12, in the year of our Lord 2019, as I write this final letter, I am serving at the "Rest & Renewal" (R&R) program hosted by the Kosin Member Care Center. At the end of this year, my pastoral ministry will draw to a close, and with it, I will lay down my duties as senior pastor of Ulsan Church. People ask if I feel bittersweet. Not at all. Rather, I feel the joy and eager anticipation of a young boy on the brink of school holidays. Reflecting on it, there is also a quiet, heartfelt sense of satisfaction that a free spirit like me was able to faithfully bear the ministry of a pastor. In truth, not only the heart to serve, but also the health to carry out this calling was God's gracious gift, for which I am immensely grateful.
The question I received most frequently throughout this year was, "What will you do after retirement?" and my standard answer was simply, "I do not know." I would often add with a smile, "The Master who directed me in active service remains my Master in retirement; and having lived seventy years, I have an eerie (?) feeling that the One who never let me idle around won't simply let me sit back and take it easy." Be that as it may, for next year I intend to take a genuine sabbatical rest. From 2021 onwards, I have received a proposal for a four-year ministry and am currently praying over it. If that ministry aligns with the passions I have long nurtured and serves the expansion of the Kingdom of the One who prepared me, how could I turn away from it?
Looking back, the seasons spent alongside the churches supporting Kosin missions, the member care ministry, my role as board chairman of the Bible Translation Fellowship which concludes next June, and even writing this annual letter to you—all of these have been privileges bestowed upon me by God. Although my senior pastoral ministry at Ulsan Church concludes at the end of the year, I will continue to reside in the home where I have lived. Fortunately, we have a lovely guest room prepared, and being able to host and serve pilgrims who live for the sake of the Gospel is a small yet profound joy. Only God knows how long I will be able to serve, given the variables of age and health... but truly, serving has been a privilege. Thank you.
Dit is my laaste brief aan ons sendelinge as die leraar van Ulsan Gemeente. Elke jaar soos die einde van die jaar nader kom en die aankondigings weerklink om geskenke vir sendelinge in te samel (wat ek, anders as die gemeentelede, drie keer agtereenvolgens tydens die eredienste hoor), het ek besef dat dit basiese hoflikheid is vir 'n ondersteunende leraar wat die "gemeenskap van die heiliges" bely om minstens een keer per jaar 'n brief aan ons sendelinge te skryf. Ondersteunende gemeentes bespreek dikwels geredelik of hulle moet voortgaan om 'n sendeling te ondersteun wat nie eens een brief per jaar stuur nie; tog twyfel geen sendeling ooit aan 'n leraar se bevoegdheid bloot omdat hy in tien jaar nie 'n enkele brief gestuur het nie. Toe ek daaroor nadink, het God my egter laat besef dat so 'n eensydige gebruik nóg ware "gemeenskap van die heiliges", nóg 'n egte vennootskap in die uitbouing van God se koninkryk is. Daarom is ek baie dankbaar dat ons oor die jare heen deur hierdie briewe met mekaar gemeenskap kon beoefen.
Vanaand, op 12 November in die jaar van ons Here 2019, terwyl ek hierdie laaste brief skryf, bedien ek by die "Rus en Herstel"-program (R&R) wat deur die Kosin Member Care-sentrum gereël word. Teen die einde van hierdie jaar sluit ek my bediening af en lê ek daarmee saam my pligte as leraar van Ulsan Gemeente neer. Vra u of ek 'n bittersoet verlange voel? Glad nie. Inteendeel, daar is die blydskap en opgewondenheid van 'n seun op die vooraand van die skoolvakansie. As ek daaroor nadink, is daar ook 'n stil, diepe dankbaarheid dat 'n vrye gees soos ek die herderlike bediening getrou kon volbring. Trouens, nie net die gewillige hart nie, maar ook die gesondheid om die roeping te kon vervul, was 'n genadegawe van God, waarvoor ek innig dankbaar is.
Die vraag wat ek vanjaar die meeste gehoor het, was: "Wat gaan u ná aftrede doen?" en my gebruiklike antwoord was bloot: "Ek weet nie." Dan het ek skertsend bygevoeg: "Die Here wat my Meester was tydens my aktiewe bediening, bly my Meester ná aftrede; en ná sewentig lewensjare het ek 'n onheilspellende (?) voorgevoel dat Hy, wat my nog nooit ledig kon aanskou nie, my beslis nie sommer net sal laat agteroor sit en luier nie." Hoe dit ook al sy, vir eers beplan ek om volgende jaar 'n egte sabbatsrus te geniet. Vanaf 2021 het ek 'n aanbod ontvang vir 'n vierjarige bediening, en ek dra daardie saak in gebed op. As daardie bediening ooreenstem met sake wat my lank reeds na aan die hart lê, en tot uitbreiding dien van die koninkryk van Hom wat my toegerus het, hoe sou ek daarvan kon wegdraai?
As ek terugkyk, was die tyd saam met die Kosin-sendingondersteunende gemeentes, die lidmaatsorg-bediening (member care), my rol as voorsitter van die Bybelvertalingsgenootskap wat aanstaande Junie tot 'n einde kom, en selfs die voorreg om jaarliks so 'n brief aan u te kon stuur—alles genadige voorregte wat God my geskenk het. Al kom my bediening as leraar van Ulsan Gemeente teen die jaareinde tot 'n einde, sal ons voortgaan om in ons huidige huis te woon. Gelukkig is daar 'n goeie gastekamer ingerig, en om pelgrims wat ter wille van die Evangelie leef te kan ontvang en bedien, is 'n klein maar kosbare vreugde. Net God weet hoe lank ek gegewe my ouderdom en gesondheid nog sal kan dien... maar om te dien, was voorwaar 'n voorreg. Baie dankie.