2022년 3월 5일 토요일 아침 이른 시간에 카톡으로 김 목사님의 문을 두드렸습니다. “잘 계시죠^^ 김 목사님~~” 6년 전 매일성경과 본문이 같다보니 그 때 기록을 만나서 기회를 잡은 겁니다. <구주대망 160405, 화, 8:38~54분, 웨일즈에서> 오늘 본문(레 4:22-35)에는 “제사장이 … 죄를 용서하여 주면, 그는 용서를 받는다”는 구절이 세 차례 반복이 되는 것이 눈에 들어옵니다. 하나님이 맡긴 직무를 잘 수행하는 것이 통치자에게나, 평민에게나 복이 되게 하여 주십시오. 오늘 오전에는 어제 방문한 김##, 양&& 목사님 식구들과 함께 가까운 (보드난트) 식물원으로 가려고 합니다. 선한 인도를 주께 부탁드리며, 어제부터 시작한 좋은 교제가 이어지게 하여 주십시오. 만나 보니 세 가정 모두 아들만 둘 있는 집들이고 하나는 교과서요 다른 하나는 만화책과 같은 아들입니다. 성경에 나오는 그 둘째 아들을 어떻게 주의 교양과 훈계로 키울 것인지를 알길 원하네요. 주님의 은혜가 필요합니다. 종우를 위한 하나님의 손길이 계속 되게 하셔서 그를 향한 귀한 사역이 한날 꽃 피우게 하여 주십시오.
김 목사님의 공부, 그 내용을 두고 고민하고 있습니다. 오늘 저녁에는 잘 듣고 하나님이 주시는 지혜로 좋은 대화를 나누게 하여주십시오. 또 오후에 돌아가게 되는 양 선교사님의 가정에도 은혜를 베푸셔서 여기서 지내는 짧은 시간이 좋은 휴식이 되게 하여 주십시오. 먼 땅에서 유학생들에게 복음을 전하기 위해 열심히 사역하시는 그 모든 수고를 하나님이 기억하여 주십시오. 눈에 띠는 결과가 없다고 후원을 중단하게 된 것을 부끄럽게 생각합니다. 어떻게 다시 회복시킬 방안이 없을까요? 혹시 사역을 글로 잘 정리해서 부탁해 볼 수 없을까 생각해 봅니다. 디아스포라 교회, 그 소중한 사역에 대한 믿음을 새롭게 하여 주시니 감사합니다. 예수님의 이름으로 기도합니다. 아멘
<2022년 3월 5일 토요일 8시 40분> “목사님, 이런 기도의 도움을 제가 받고 있었네요. 언제나 만나는 모든 동역자들을 이렇게 진심으로 축복하는 목사님의 마음을 저도 꼭 배우고 싶고 닮고 싶습니다. 양 선교사님 소식이 문득 궁금해지네요. 언젠가 저도 기회가 허락되면 꼭 돕고 싶은 사역이었습니다. 사랑의 빚도 참 많이 졌는데 말입니다. 교과서 같은 첫째는 작년에 겨우겨우 입교를 했습니다. 믿음이 없는 것 같다며 입교를 미루고자 하는 아이를 보며 아내와 한달을 뒤에서 울며 기도했답니다. 앞에서는 애써 태연한 척하며, “괜찮아, 믿음 주시도록 기도하고 천천히 입교를 해도 된단다..”라고 이야기는 했지만 정작 속으로는 얼마나 피눈물이 나고 다급했는지요. 만화책 같은 둘째는 요즘 농구학원을 다니면서 운동을 배우고, 또래 목사님 아들 둘과 삼총사가 되어 맨날 몰려다닙니다. 쉽게 학원에 보낼 수 없는 목사 가정 아이들이라, 남는게 시간이다 보니 아주 즐겁게 초등학교 마지막 학년을 불태우고 있습니다. 막내 연우는 벌써 5살입니다. 동네 교회가 운영하는 어린이집을 다니는데, 반에서 만나는 친구들을 얼마나 좋아하는지 모릅니다.
아내는 이곳에서 사모모임을 통해 여러가지 생각들을 정리하고 있습니다. 언제나 가장 모범이 되는 롤 모델로는 당연 김## 사모님을 꼽습니다. 범접할 수 없는 모델이라, 오히려 자유함을 느낍니다. 이건 노력해서 되는 수준이 아니라는걸 깨달은 것이죠. ㅎㅎ 목사님, 저는 요즘 기도하는 시간이 많이 즐거워졌고 말없이 그냥 주님 앞에 앉아있는 시간도 조금은 늘었습니다. 내가 억지로 해서 되는 일이 아니라 주님이 하시는 일들을 믿고 기다리는 목회의 길을 이제서야 조금 깨닫습니다. 그나저나 갈길은 왜 이리 멀고, 언제나 제대로 무언가를 할 준비는 안된 것 같은지 모르겠습니다. ㅠㅠ 목사님 사모님 강건하시길 기도합니다. 저희를 위한 목사님의 기도가 있었다니 문득 더 격려가 됩니다!!!!!! “ “소식 감사합니다. 9시부터 에스라 모금을 위한 줌 설명회 때문에 (답이) 늦었습니다.”
Early on Saturday morning, March 5, 2022, I knocked on Pastor Kim's door via KakaoTalk. “I hope you are doing well^^ Pastor Kim~~” Since the passage in the Daily Bible happened to be the same as six years ago, I came across my notes from back then and seized the opportunity.
<Awaiting the Lord, April 5, 2016, Tuesday, 8:38–54 AM, from Wales>
In today's passage (Leviticus 4:22–35), the phrase “the priest shall make atonement for them, and they will be forgiven” catches my eye, repeated three times. May the faithful fulfillment of God-given duties become a blessing to rulers and ordinary people alike. This morning, I plan to visit the nearby Bodnant Garden with the families of Pastor Kim and Pastor Yang, who arrived yesterday. I pray for the Lord's gracious guidance, and that the wonderful fellowship that began yesterday may continue. Meeting them, I see that all three families have two sons each; one son is like a textbook, while the other is like a comic book. They yearn to know how to raise those second sons—reminiscent of the prodigal son in the Bible—in the training and instruction of the Lord. We truly need the Lord's grace. May God's caring hand remain upon Jongwoo, so that the precious ministry prepared for him may blossom in its appointed time.
I have been pondering deeply over Pastor Kim's studies and its contents. Please grant that I may listen attentively tonight and share meaningful conversations endowed with God-given wisdom. Also, grant grace to Missionary Yang's family, who will be returning this afternoon, so that their brief stay here may serve as a sweet rest. May God remember all their devoted labors in preaching the Gospel to international students in a foreign land. I feel deeply remorseful that their support was suspended simply because there were no conspicuous results. Is there any way to restore it? I wonder if we might organize his ministry into writing and make an appeal. Thank You, Lord, for renewing our faith in this precious diaspora church ministry. In Jesus' name, I pray. Amen.
<Saturday, March 5, 2022, 8:40 AM>
“Pastor, to think I have been receiving the support of such prayers all along! I truly wish to learn from and emulate your heart, which genuinely blesses every co-laborer you meet. Hearing this suddenly makes me wonder how Missionary Yang is doing. If ever the opportunity arose, that was a ministry I desperately wanted to support, especially since I owe them such a great debt of love. Our textbook-like eldest barely completed his church confirmation last year. Seeing him want to postpone it because he felt he lacked faith, my wife and I spent a month crying and praying behind the scenes. In front of him, we tried hard to act nonchalant, saying, ‘It’s okay, we can pray for faith and take our time with confirmation...’ but inside, my heart was weeping tears of blood and filled with utter urgency. Our comic book-like second child has recently been attending a basketball academy to learn sports, forming a trio of musketeers with two other pastors' sons of his age, always roaming around together. Being children of pastoral families who can't easily afford many academies, time is the only thing they have in abundance, so they are joyfully burning through their final year of elementary school. Our youngest, Yeonwoo, is already five years old. She attends a daycare run by a neighborhood church and loves the friends in her class so dearly.
My wife has been sorting through her thoughts through the pastors' wives fellowship here. Without hesitation, she always names Mrs. Kim as her greatest role model. Because she is such an untouchable model, it actually brings a sense of freedom. She realized it isn’t something one can achieve merely by striving, haha. Pastor, these days I find much greater joy in my prayer time, and the time spent just sitting quietly before the Lord has grown a bit too. Only now am I beginning to realize that pastoral ministry is not accomplished by my own force, but by trusting and waiting upon the work of the Lord. Even so, I wonder why the road ahead still feels so long, and why I always feel so unprepared to do anything properly. ㅠㅠ I pray that you and your wife remain in good health and strength. Knowing that your prayers have been with us brings such sudden and immense encouragement!!!!!!”
“Thank you for the warm update. My reply was delayed because of a Zoom briefing for the Ezra Bible Graduate University fundraiser that began at 9:00.”
Vroeg op Saterdagoggend, 5 Maart 2022, het ek via KakaoTalk aan ds. Kim se deur geklop. “Gaan dit nog goed^^ Ds. Kim~~” Omdat die Skrifgedeelte in die Daaglikse Bybel presies dieselfde was as dié van ses jaar gelede, het ek op my destydse aantekeninge afgekom en die geleentheid aangegryp.
<Verwagting op die Verlosser, 5 April 2016, Dinsdag, 8:38–54 vm., vanuit Wallis>
In vandag se teks (Levitikus 4:22–35) val dit my op dat die frase “die priester moet vir hom versoening doen... en dit sal hom vergewe word” drie keer herhaal word. Mag die getroue uitvoering van die pligte wat God toevertrou het, tot seën wees vir sowel heersers as gewone mense. Vanoggend beplan ek om saam met die gesinne van ds. Kim en ds. Yang, wat gister aangekom het, na die nabygeleë Bodnant-botaniese tuin te gaan. Ek bid vir die Here se goeie leiding, en dat die kosbare gemeenskap wat gister begin het, sal voortduur. Toe ons mekaar ontmoet, het dit geblyk dat al drie gesinne net twee seuns het; die een seun is soos 'n handboek, terwyl die ander soos 'n strokiesprentboek is. Hulle smag daarna om te weet hoe om daardie tweede seun—soos die verlore seun in die Bybel—in die tug en vermaning van die Here groot te maak. Ons het waarlik die Here se genade nodig. Mag God se bewarende hand op Jongwoo bly, sodat die kosbare bediening wat vir hom bestem is, eendag mooi tot bloei mag kom.
Ek dink diep na oor ds. Kim se studies en die inhoud daarvan. Gee asseblief dat ek vanaand aandagtig mag luister en met godgegewe wysheid betekenisvolle gesprekke kan voer. Skenk ook genade aan die gesin van sendeling Yang, wat vanmiddag vertrek, sodat die kort tydjie hier vir hulle 'n verkwikkende rus mag wees. Mag die Here al hul getroue arbeid onthou terwyl hulle die Evangelie aan buitelandse studente in 'n verre land verkondig. Ek skaam my daaroor dat hul finansiële ondersteuning gestaak is bloot omdat daar geen opvallende resultate was nie. Is daar geen manier om dit weer te herstel nie? Ek wonder of ons sy bediening op skrif kan stel om weer ondersteuning te vra. Dankie, Here, dat U ons geloof in hierdie kosbare diaspora-gemeentebediening vernuwe. In die Naam van Jesus bid ek. Amen.
<Saterdag, 5 Maart 2022, 8:40 vm.>
“Dominee, om te dink dat ek al die tyd deur sulke gebede gedra is! Ek wil so graag leer by u hart wat elke medewerker wat u ontmoet, so opreg seën, en dit navolg. Ek wonder meteens hoe dit met sendeling Yang gaan. As die geleentheid hom ooit voorgedoen het, was dit 'n bediening wat ek baie graag wou ondersteun, veral omdat ek so 'n groot skuld van liefde aan hulle het. Ons handboek-agtige oudste het verlede jaar skaars belydenis van geloof afgelê. Toe ons sien hoe hy dit wou uitstel omdat hy gevoel het hy het nie genoeg geloof nie, het ek en my vrou 'n maand lank agter die skerms gehuil en gebid. Voor hom het ons probeer om kalm te bly en gesê: ‘Dis reg so, ons kan bid dat die Here geloof gee en jy kan maar rustig belydenis doen...’, maar van binne het my hart bloedtrane gehuil en was ek vol dringendheid. Ons strokiesprent-agtige tweede seun gaan deesdae na 'n basketbalakademie om sport te leer, en saam met twee ander predikantseuns van sy ouderdom het hulle 'n hegte driemanskap geword wat gedurig saam rondrits. Aangesien kinders uit predikantsgesinne nie maklik na talle naskoolse akademies gestuur kan word nie, het hulle oorgenoeg vrye tyd en geniet hulle hul laaste laerskooljaar terdeë. Ons jongste, Yeonwoo, is al vyf jaar oud. Sy gaan na 'n kleuterskool wat deur 'n plaaslike gemeente bestuur word, en sy is verskriklik lief vir die maatjies in haar klas.
My vrou kry tans baie van haar gedagtes agtermekaar deur die predikantsvrouebyeenkoms hier. Sonder twyfel beskou sy mev. Kim altyd as die grootste rolmodel. Omdat sy so 'n onbereikbare voorbeeld is, bring dit eintlik 'n gevoel van bevryding. Sy het besef dat dit nie iets is wat 'n mens bloot deur eie krag kan bereik nie, haha. Dominee, deesdae geniet ek my gebedstye baie meer, en die tyd wat ek bloot stil voor die Here sit, het ook effens vermeerder. Eers nou begin ek bietjie begryp dat die bediening nie iets is wat ek self kan afforseer nie, maar 'n pad van vertroue waarin 'n mens wag op die werk van die Here. Nogtans wonder ek waarom die pad vorentoe so lank voel, en waarom dit altyd voel asof ek nooit regtig gereed is om enigiets behoorlik te doen nie. ㅠㅠ Ek bid dat u en mevrou gesond en geseënd sal bly. Om te weet dat u al die tyd vir ons gebid het, dien skielik as 'n geweldige bemoediging!!!!!!”
“Baie dankie vir die goeie nuus. My antwoord was effens vertraag weens 'n Zoom-inligtingsessie om 09:00 vir die fondsinsameling van Ezra Bybelse Nagraadse Universiteit.”