요즈음은 가끔씩 보낸 칼럼을 읽지 않는 분들도 제 안부를 묻는 경우도 있습니다. 그러면서 답답했을 것인데 어떻게 견디었는지를 자주 묻기도 합니다. 물론 왼쪽 대퇴골 뼈가 부러졌으니 힘들고 불편한 것은 다 말할 수 없지만, 특별히 “답답하다”는 생각을 한 적은 없습니다. 수술 후 입원과 퇴원을 하고, 집에서 요양을 한, 지난 다섯 달을 돌아봤을 때, 오히려 새로운 세상을 보게 되었다고 말하고 싶습니다. 동천동강병원에서 3주를 지내면서 뼈를 다치는 분들이 그렇게 많다는 사실과 수고하는 의료인들을 만나게 되었습니다. 2주 가까이 재활치료를 받았던 제니스병원에서는 병원에서도 호텔처럼 대우를 받을 수 있다는 사실이 감동이었습니다.
오늘 아침에는 해가 뜨는 것을 보면서 상아산이라는 우리 동네 앞산을 올라갔습니다. 다친 지 다섯 달 되던 날, 소원하던 대역사를 이루었습니다. 나이에 비해 빨리 회복되어서 정말 감사하고 있습니다. 기도해 주신 성도들, 좋은 것이라면 공급하기를 그치지 않던 그 사랑 덕분입니다. 물론 이전처럼 온전해지는데는 시간이 더 필요하지만, 이제는 하늘을 날거나 물위를 걷지 않아도, 땅을 딛고 사는 것이 기적임을 날마다 실감합니다. 목발 두 개에서 하나로, 줄어들어도 감사했고, 도구 없이 두 다리로 걷는 것은 꿈꾸는 것 같았습니다. 시멘트 포장이 된 농로의 딱딱한 감촉이 싫어서, 조금은 무리인줄 알면서, 며칠 전부터는 스틱을 가지고 조심조심 뒷산으로 가 보았습니다. 그러다가 오늘은 마침내 앞산 상아산 포토존까지 다녀오게 되었습니다. 정말 감격스러웠습니다. 왕복 8,500보 두 시간 가까이 걸렸습니다.
행정구역으로는 울주군 범서읍 두산리(큰마을길 52-5)에 이사 와서 산 지가 15년은 넘었는데, 그동안 걸어 보지 못한 동네 앞 농로 길을 아침마다 성실하게 걸었습니다. 처음에는 목발 두 개로, 뒤에는 한 개로, 결국은 내 두 발로 걷는 변화는 있었지만, 같은 길을 끈질기게 걸은 셈입니다. 그러면서 논에 심긴 벼가 자라는 것을 매일 보다가, 가을이 되면서 조금씩 익어가는 들판을 바라보는 특권을 누렸습니다. 9월부터 들판에서 바라보는 가을 하늘이 그렇게 예쁜 줄은 정말 예전에는 미쳐 몰랐습니다. 하늘 색깔이며 구름의 모양이 순간순간 변하는 것도 그렇게 아름답다는 것을 전에는 실감하지 못했다고 말하고 싶습니다. 천천히 들판을 걸으면서 음미하는 하늘은 정말 하나님께 어울리는 커다란 캔버스였습니다.
또한 아침 7시를 전후해서 경주쪽으로 향하는 까마귀들이 하늘을 덮습니다. 수학여행을 가는지 역사기행이라도 가는지 얼마나 재잘되는지 장관입니다. 그러다가 예약된 숙소 십리대밭을 찾아서 저녁에는 울산으로 향합니다. 우리는 산책을 끝내고 집으로 돌아와 보이차 타임을 갖습니다. 그러고는 각자 자기 방으로 가서 하루의 일과를 시작합니다. 매일성경 본문을 따라 묵상과 기도를 시작하기 전에 카톡이 알려주는 오늘 생일인 분들의 이름 가운데 아는 분들에게 문안톡을 보내는 것이 일상입니다. 그것은 “성도가 서로 교제하는 것”을 믿는 또 하나의 방안입니다. 때로는 서로 뜸했던 소식을 묻기도 하고, 급한 기도제목을 나누기도 하고, 마음을 나누다보면 거기서 끝나지 않기도 합니다. 산책을 할 때는 로이드존스의 설교를 귀에 꽂고, 책상 앞에서는 읽고 싶은 책을 읽고, 때로는 이와 같은 글을 쓰다보면 하루가 빨리 지나갑니다. 감사하게도 주님 오심을 기다리는 성도의 삶에는 지루함이 있을 수가 없습니다.
Lately, even those who do not regularly read my occasional columns have reached out to ask how I am doing. They often wonder aloud how I managed to endure such a seemingly frustrating season. Naturally, having fractured my left femur, the physical hardship and discomfort were far beyond words, yet I never found myself thinking, "This is so frustrating." Looking back on these past five months—the surgery, the hospital stays, the discharge, and the quiet recuperation at home—I would rather say that my eyes were opened to a brand-new world. Spending three weeks at Dongcheon Dongkang Hospital, I realized just how many people suffer bone injuries, and I was blessed to witness the dedicated medical staff who care for them. Then, during nearly two weeks of rehabilitation at Zenith Hospital, I was deeply moved to find that one could truly receive hotel-quality hospitality even in a hospital setting.
This morning, watching the sun rise, I climbed Sangasan, the hill right in front of our neighborhood. Exactly five months after my injury, I achieved this long-awaited milestone. Given my age, I am exceedingly thankful for such a swift recovery. It is all thanks to the prayers of the saints and their enduring love, always eager to share whatever good things they had. Of course, complete restoration will still take more time, yet each day I am reminded that even without flying through the air or walking on water, simply walking upon the earth with both feet planted is a miracle in itself. Going from two crutches to one filled me with gratitude, and walking on my own two feet without any aids felt like a waking dream. Disliking the unforgiving hardness of the paved farm roads, and knowing it might be a bit ambitious, I took a hiking pole and gingerly made my way up the hill behind our home a few days ago. And today, I finally reached the photo zone atop our front hill, Sangasan. It was truly overwhelming with emotion. Round-trip, it was nearly 8,500 steps and took about two hours.
Administratively, it has been over fifteen years since we moved to Dusan-ri, Beomseo-eup, Ulju-gun (52-5 Keunmaeul-gil), yet every morning I faithfully walked the village farm roads that I had never set foot on all those years. While my gait evolved—starting with two crutches, then one, and finally walking on my own two feet—I persevered along that same familiar path. Along the way, having watched the green rice plants thrive day by day, I was blessed with the privilege of seeing the fields gradually turn golden with autumn. Never before had I realized just how breathtaking the autumn sky appears when viewed from the open fields beginning in September. I must confess I had never truly appreciated how each shifting shade of the sky and every passing cloud could be so deeply magnificent. Savoring the expansive sky as I strolled slowly through the fields, it felt like an immense canvas worthy of God Himself.
Moreover, around seven o'clock in the morning, a vast flock of crows blankets the sky heading toward Gyeongju. Chatting and cawing animatedly, as if embarking on a school excursion or a historical tour, they present a truly magnificent sight. Then, in the evening, they wing their way back toward Ulsan to their reserved lodging at the Simnidae-bat (the Ten-Ri Bamboo Grove). Finishing our morning walk, we return home and share a warm cup of Pu-erh tea. Afterward, we each head to our rooms to begin our daily routines. Before opening the Daily Bible guide for meditation and prayer, it has become my routine to send greeting messages to friends and acquaintances whose birthdays are alerted by KakaoTalk. This is yet another way I live out my belief in "the communion of saints." Sometimes we catch up after long silences, share urgent prayer requests, and as our hearts open to one another, the conversations often blossom far beyond a simple greeting. Listening to Martyn Lloyd-Jones's sermons during my walks, reading good books at my desk, and occasionally writing reflections like this, the days glide by swiftly. Gratefully, in the life of a believer eagerly awaiting the Lord's return, there is simply no room for boredom.
Deesdae verneem selfs diegene wat my sporadiese rubrieke nie gereeld lees nie, na my welstand. Hulle vra my dikwels hoe ek so 'n oënskynlik frustrerende en benouende tyd kon deurstaan. Aangesien my linkerdybeen gebreek was, was die swaarkry en ongemak natuurlik meer as wat woorde kan beskryf, tog het ek myself nooit betrap dat ek dink: "Dit is so verstikkend" nie. As ek terugkyk op die afgelope vyf maande—van die operasie en hospitaalverblyf tot my ontslag en herstel tuis—wil ek eerder sê dat 'n heeltemal nuwe wêreld vir my oopgegaan het. Gedurende my drie weke in die Dongcheon Dongkang-hospitaal het ek besef hoeveel mense beenbeserings opdoen, en ek het die toegewyde mediese personeel leer ken wat hulle met soveel sorg bystaan. Daarna, tydens byna twee weke se rehabilitasie in die Zenith-hospitaal, was ek diep geraak deur die wete dat 'n mens selfs in 'n hospitaal soos 'n gas in 'n hotel behandel kan word.
Vandag, terwyl die son opkom, het ek Sangasan uitgeklim, die heuwel reg voor ons buurt. Presies vyf maande ná my besering het ek hierdie lang gekoesterde mylpaal bereik. Gesien my jare, is ek innig dankbaar vir so 'n spoedige herstel. Dit is alles te danke aan die gebede van die gelowiges en hul onblusbare liefde, wat altyd gereed was om met die beste dinge te voorsien. Dit sal natuurlik nog tyd neem om weer heeltemal die oue te wees, maar selfs sonder om deur die lug te vlieg of op water te loop, besef ek nou daagliks dat dit 'n wonderwerk op sigself is om net met albei voete op die grond te leef. Om van twee krukke na een oor te skakel was al rede tot dankbaarheid, en om sonder enige hulpmiddel op my eie twee bene te loop, het soos 'n droom gevoel. Omdat ek nie van die harde gevoel van die geplaveide plaaspaaie hou nie, en terwyl ek geweet het dit verg dalk bietjie baie, het ek 'n paar dae gelede versigtig met 'n stapstok teen die agterste heuwel begin uitstap. En vandag het ek uiteindelik die fotopunt bo-op ons voorste heuwel, Sangasan, bereik. Dit was 'n oomblik van diepe emosie. Die heen-en-weer stap was byna 8 500 treë en het omtrent twee uur geduur.
Administratief gesproke woon ons nou al meer as vyftien jaar in Dusan-ri, Beomseo-eup, Ulju-gun (Keunmaeul-weg 52-5), tog het ek elke oggend getrou die plaaspaadjies voor ons buurt gaan stap wat ek in al daardie jare nooit vantevore betree het nie. Al was daar 'n vordering in hoe ek beweeg het—eers met twee krukke, toe met een, en uiteindelik op my eie voete—het ek dieselfde pad volhardend bly stap. Terwyl ek daagliks die rysplante in die lande sien groei het, het ek die voorreg geniet om te aanskou hoe die velde met die koms van die herfs goudgeel ryp word. Ek het vantevore nooit besef hoe asemrowend mooi die herfshemel is wanneer 'n mens dit van September af oor die oop velde aanskou nie. Ek moet erken dat ek voorheen nooit werklik besef het hoe wonderbaarlik die skakerings van die lug en die voortdurend veranderende wolkformasies van oomblik tot oomblik kan wees nie. Soos ek stadig deur die velde gestap en die hemel ingedrink het, het dit gevoel soos 'n reusagtige doek wat waarlik God waardig is.
Boonop, omstreeks sewe-uur die oggend, bedek 'n swerm kraaie die lug op pad na Gyeongju. Hulle kwetter en raas uitbundig asof hulle op 'n skooluitstappie of 'n historiese toer gaan—'n wonderlike skouspel. Teen die aand vlieg hulle weer terug na Ulsan na hul bespreekte tuiste in die Simnidae-bat (die Tien-Ri-bamboesbos). Ná ons oggendwandeling keer ons huis toe en geniet 'n rustige koppie Pu-erh-tee. Daarna gaan elkeen na sy eie kamer om die dagtaak te begin. Voordat ek die Daaglikse Bybel oopmaak vir oordenking en gebed, is dit my daaglikse gewoonte om gelukwensings via KakaoTalk te stuur aan die bekendes wie se verjaarsdae aangedui word. Dit is nog 'n manier om gestalte te gee aan ons geloof in "die gemeenskap van die heiliges." Soms hoor ons weer van mekaar ná 'n lang stilte, deel ons dringende gebedsversoeke, en wanneer 'n mens harte met mekaar deel, bly dit selde net by 'n kort groet. Met Martyn Lloyd-Jones se preke in my ore tydens my wandelinge, 'n goeie boek voor my op die lessenaar, en deur af en toe sulke stukke te skryf, vlieg die dae verby. Genadiglik is daar in die lewe van 'n gelowige wat uitsien na die koms van die Here, nooit enige ruimte vir verveling nie.