내일 아침 9시에 집을 떠나 KTX로 광명 경유 인천에서 미국으로 출국합니다. 아들들은 어디 살아도 ‘해외동포’라는 말이 있습니다만, 우리 아들 둘은 하나는 미국, 둘째는 캐나다에 사니까 명실공히 ‘해외동포’입니다.
몇 달 전부터 올여름에는 미국에 다녀가라고 요청하기에 그럴 필요가 없다고 답을 했습니다. 큰 아들네 식구들은 6월에 한국을 다녀갔지만 영주권이 걸려 있는 캐나다에 사는 둘째네는 오지 못하는데, 은퇴한 할머니 할아버지가 가서 만나야 하지 않느냐며 끈질기게 설득했습니다.
50대 중반으로 진입하는 큰 아들 입장에서는 친구들 부모들의 건강이 갑자기 악화되는 경우도 보고, 세상을 떠나는 경우도 만나면서, 기회 있을 때 손자들과 함께 하는 시간을 가졌으면 하는가 봅니다. 게다가 장거리 여행이 항상 가능하지 않은 것도 사실입니다.
어제 제 일정에는 1시간 반이 여행준비시간으로 잡혔으니 내막을 짐작하실 분도 있을 겁니다. 내일(7/27) 출발해서 9월 1일 귀국하는 꽉 찬 5주간의 여행준비가 1시간 반으로 된다는 것은 손오공처럼 신출귀몰한 재주를 피우지 않는 한 불가능합니다. 그 이면에는 며칠 전부터 이런저런 준비로 아내의 손길이 바빴을 것입니다. 1시간 반은 내가 필요한 물건을 챙기는 시간일 뿐입니다. 비행기에 오가며 읽을 책이든지 5주간 휴가 중에 읽을 자료를 챙기고 매일 투여하는 인슐린과 먹는 약을 챙기는 정도에 들어가는 시간일 것입니다.
게다가 방금 전화가 걸려왔습니다. 소호교회 담임 목사님 내외와 그 부근에 살고 계시는 선교사님 내외가 복날을 핑계해서 하필 오늘 저녁식사를 하자고 연락을 하는 것은 어쩌면 내일 출국하는 우리를 배려한 사랑임을 느낍니다. 아직도 일이 산더미 같이 남아있는 아내의 상황을 알면서도 감당할 수 없는 사랑으로 다가오는 친구들 사이에서 결단을 내려야 하는 남편의 입장도 순간적으로는 난감했습니다.
그러나 어쩌겠습니까? ‘일보다는 사람이 먼저’라고 생각하고 평생을 살아온 사람이 내리는 결론은 뻔합니다. 옆에서 전화를 듣는 아내의 표정은 눈길을 돌리고 싶을 만큼 당황스러웠습니다.
저녁에도 앞집 손 집사님이 오시기로 했고 오시면 드리겠다고 호박찌개를 끓일 준비를 갖추어 두었으니 이를 어찌해야 좋을까요? 바로 찌개를 끓이고 틈틈이 집을 정리하며 짐을 챙기며 ‘미친년 널 뛰듯이’ 바쁜 아내를 바라보고 있을 뿐입니다. 지난 51년 6개월의 축소판이라고 보아도 좋을 것입니다. 불같이 화를 낼 법도 한데 침착하게 처리하는 아내를 보면서 하늘이 내린 선녀와 살고 있다는 생각이 들어야 정상일 것입니다.
오늘 주일예배에 참석하고 오니 담임 목사님이 연락을 해왔습니다.
시골에 살다 보니 나가는 일이 늘 쉽지 않습니다. 들어올 때는 공항이든 역이든 택시가 즐비하니 문제가 없습니다. 그래서 답을 했습니다.
교회에 부탁을 할까… 딸들이라고 말하는 분들 중에서 자원토록 할까… 여러 궁리를 해봤지만 가장 편하게 도와주실 분은 아무래도 친구같고 동생같은 장로님이 떠올랐습니다.
뜨거운 여름 날씨에도 불구하고 여러분들이 베풀어주시는 사랑과 관심이 참 고맙습니다.
Tomorrow morning at 9:00 AM, we leave home, taking the KTX via Gwangmyeong to Incheon to depart for the United States. There is a saying that wherever sons live, they become 'overseas compatriots.' Since our two sons live in the U.S. and Canada respectively, they are indeed overseas compatriots in every sense of the word.
For a few months now, our eldest son had been urging us to visit America this summer, but I kept answering that there was no need. His family had already visited Korea in June, while our second son's family in Canada could not travel due to their permanent residency process. Persistently, our eldest argued: shouldn't their retired grandparents go and see them?
Now entering his mid-fifties, my eldest son has witnessed his friends' parents suddenly falling ill or passing away. He must have felt that while there is still time, we ought to spend precious moments together with our grandchildren. Besides, it is also true that long-distance travel will not always be possible for us.
Yesterday, my schedule had an hour and a half allotted for 'packing for the trip,' so some of you might already guess the real story behind it. Getting ready for a full five-week trip—leaving tomorrow (July 27) and returning on September 1—in just an hour and a half would be utterly impossible unless one possessed the magical, shape-shifting powers of the Monkey King. Behind the scenes, my wife's hands have been bustling with endless preparations for days. That hour and a half on my schedule was merely the time it took for me to gather my personal belongings: books to read on the flights, study materials for the five-week stay, my daily insulin doses, and routine medications.
On top of that, the phone just rang. The pastor and his wife from Soho Church, along with a missionary couple living nearby, called to invite us to dinner tonight on the pretext of 'Boknal' (one of the hottest days of summer). I sensed their warm, considerate love, wanting to share a meal with us before our departure tomorrow. Yet, knowing my wife still faced a mountain of unfinished chores, I found myself in a momentary dilemma as a husband, torn between tasks and the overwhelming kindness of dear friends.
Still, what could I do? The conclusion of someone who has lived a lifetime believing that 'people come before tasks' was self-evident. As my wife listened to the phone call beside me, her expression was so bewildered that I almost wanted to look away.
To make matters more complicated, Deacon Son from across the street was already scheduled to drop by this evening, and my wife had already prepared everything to boil zucchini stew for him. What were we to do? All I could do was watch my wife, frantically busy, making the stew on the spot, tidying up the house in between, and packing our bags. It felt like an epitome of our past fifty-one years and six months of marriage. While anyone else might have flared up in anger, watching her handle it all with steady composure makes me realize I truly must be living with an angel sent from heaven.
After returning from Sunday worship today, our senior pastor contacted us.
Living in the countryside, getting out to town or the station is never quite simple. Coming home is fine, as taxis line up at the airport or train station, but leaving home is another matter. So I replied.
I wondered whether to ask the church... or perhaps invite one of the ladies who calls herself our 'daughter' to volunteer... After turning over many thoughts, the person who came to mind—someone who could help us most comfortably—was an elder who is like a dear friend and a younger brother to me.
Despite this sweltering summer heat, I am deeply grateful for the abundant love and thoughtful care everyone has shown us.
Môreoggend om 09:00 vertrek ons van die huis af, neem die KTX via Gwangmyeong na Incheon, en vlieg vandaar na die Verenigde State. Daar is 'n gesegde dat waar seuns ook al woon, hulle 'oorsese landgenote' word. Aangesien ons twee seuns onderskeidelik in Amerika en Kanada woon, is hulle waarlik en sonder twyfel oorsese landgenote.
'n Paar maande gelede het ons oudste seun aangedring dat ons hierdie somer na Amerika moet kom, maar ek het geantwoord dat dit nie nodig is nie. Sy gesin het reeds in Junie vir Korea gekuier, maar ons tweede seun se gesin in Kanada kon weens hul aansoek om permanente verblyfreg nie kom nie. Ons oudste het ons aanhoudend probeer oortuig: behoort afgetrede grootouers dan nie te kom kuier om hulle te sien nie?
Noudat hy sy middel-vyftigs nader, sien my oudste seun hoe sy vriende se ouers se gesondheid skielik agteruitgaan of hoe van hulle te sterwe kom. Hy het seker gevoel dat ons, terwyl daar nog 'n geleentheid is, kosbare tyd saam met die kleinkinders behoort deur te bring. Boonop is dit ook waar dat langafstandreise nie vir altyd moontlik sal wees nie.
Gister was daar 'n uur en 'n half op my program vir reisvoorbereiding uitgesit, en party van julle kan seker raai wat werklik daaragter skuil. Om binne 'n skrale anderhalfuur gereed te maak vir 'n volle reis van vyf weke—vanaf môre (27 Julie) tot 1 September—is heeltemal onmoontlik, tensy 'n mens soos die Aapkoning oor magiese toertjies beskik. Agter die skerms was my vrou se hande al dae lank besig met allerhande voorbereidings. Daardie anderhalfuur was bloot die tyd wat ek nodig gehad het om my eie persoonlike goed bymekaar te kry: boeke om op die vliegtuig te lees, studiemateriaal vir die vyf weke lange verblyf, my daaglikse insulien en my gereelde medikasie.
Bo-op alles het die telefoon so pas gelui. Die leraar en sy vrou van Soho Gemeente, tesame met 'n sendelingpaar wat naby woon, het gebel om ons vanaand vir ete uit te nooi onder die voorwendsel van 'Boknal' (die warm somerhittedae). Ek het dadelik aangevoel dat dit hul liefdevolle bedagsaamheid is teenoor ons wat môre vertrek. Tog was dit vir my as man 'n moeilike oomblik om 'n besluit te neem, vasgevang tussen vriende wat ons met oorweldigende liefde nader, terwyl ek terdeë weet dat my vrou nog met 'n berg werk sit.
Maar wat kan 'n mens doen? Die besluit van iemand wat sy lewe lank geglo het dat 'mense belangriker as take is', was vanselfsprekend. My vrou, wat langs my na die oproep geluister het, se uitdrukking was egter so verbouereerd dat ek amper my oë wou wegdraai.
Om sake nog meer gekompliseerd te maak, sou diaken Son van oorkant die straat vanaand kom kuier, en my vrou het reeds alles reggekry om murgpampoentjiebredie vir hom voor te berei. Wat moes ons tog doen? Al wat ek kon doen, was om toe te kyk hoe sy vinnig die bredie maak, tussenin die huis regruk en die tasse pak—besig soos 'n mier op 'n warm plaat. Dit was eintlik 'n klein spieëlbeeld van ons afgelope 51 jaar en ses maande saam. Enigeen sou geregtig gewees het om woedend te raak, maar as ek sien hoe kalm sy alles hanteer, besef ek weer dat ek waarlik met 'n engel uit die hemel saamleef.
Nadat ons vandag van die Sondagdiens teruggekom het, het ons leraar ons gekontak.
Aangesien ons op die platteland woon, is dit nie altyd maklik om weg te kom nie. Om terug te kom is geen probleem nie, want daar is altyd oorgenoeg taxi's by die lughawe of die stasie. Daarom het ek geantwoord.
Ek het gewonder of ek die gemeente moes vra... en of een van dié wat hulself ons 'dogters' noem, vrywillig sou aanbied... Ná baie oorweging het die persoon wat die gemaklikste hulp sou kon verleen, by my opgekom: 'n ouderling wat vir my soos 'n goeie vriend en 'n jonger broer is.
Ten spyte van hierdie snikhete somerweer is ek innig dankbaar vir al die liefde en besorgdheid wat u almal aan ons bewys.